my little moan about life and rivers and things the other day was really about interpersonal relationships. as with most of life’s problems, its the inability to control others that drives me crazy. i can however, control my own reactions and responses (to some extent) and even though its hard and confronting and painful, an honest conversation has helped restore some equanimity. my real problem is that i dont like change, to be honest. i had such an unpredictable and volatile early homelife, when i escaped i developed a crushing need to have everything be Just So. of course, thats not possible, but i am getting better at figuring out what i can and cant control, what i can and cant accept. so today, the river is running a little smoother and i am feeling a bit more on top of things again.
and seriously, its impossible for me to live through more than a few days of misery. it is true that the things that get thrown into my own personal river these days are on the whole more good than bad, and i try really hard to keep some perspective and gratitude to help to restore the balance.
some of those things worth mentioning today are
1. emerging leaves on the magnolia:
there is a lot happening on this tree at the moment. it sits against the north facing wall at the front of the house, and it gets sun almost all day, so its sense of imminent spring may be a little inflated. but thats ok by me, because the show is spectacular.
2. loyal canines. last night when i was cooking, i turned around to see one my favourite things:
he does this all the time, he has done it since he was a puppy. his front paw is right on the line between the kitchen and the dining room and he will wait like for that for hours. just in case. cattle dogs are really labradors in disguise.
3. trips overseas.
i may have mentioned that i was going to the US for a conference later this year. we have finally been confirmed and accomodations and tickets are now being booked. as it is my sisters 40th birthday in late november, i have convinced her she needs to come with me. i am not that interested in LA so we are going to fly into san franscisco (13 hours away!), spend two nights there, then go to washington DC for 4 nights where the conference is being held, then take a train across to new york city and spend 5 days there, coming home from JFK (that flight only takes 2 days or so!!). i am now taking recommendations for hotels in SF and NY (though a very evil rosered is close to convincing me that we need to splurge and stay here), and of course, yarn stores. dates are december 6 to december 18.
so you know. i cant complain. no i cant.
interestingly, there is one area in my crafting life where i experience quite a deal of resistance to change, and this is in my attitude towards crochet, or, as i prefer to call it, the craft that can not be named. go on, call me a crafting snob, whatever, i dont care. i cant help it, but crochet has just never rung my bell. this is starting to shift a little bit though because ive recently watched a number of clever people make lovely crocheted things, and seen the humble old granny square completely reinvented. the colours and yarns can be really spectacular. i found my non-crochet resolve seriously tested this last weekend when flicking through this book, and i came across this pattern. i love blue and white homewares (as you can tell from the washing on the line this weekend):
and i can just see these little circles of blue and white yarny goodness on my bed. there are however, two potential issues here. one is my hand-eye co-ordination. the most crochet ive ever done is a single chain for a provisional cast on, and watching me try and loop yarn over the hook is, well, amusing. second is a hypothetical issue, like, what if a dog (or two, or three) got up on the bed. not that they do. but just in case, like on a really cold night, they snuck in maybe and snuggled up, because they knew i was cold, and they didnt want me to be cold, say.
me and dogs and delicate delft crochet? maybe not such a good idea after all….